Journey Part 3: Inspired.

[DarK_SouL]

'Wha...!" The Admin turned around. "Ah, I knew you'd crawl out of your hiding eventually! So are you planning to run away again like the wimp you are?" "Humph... Luxray use Thunder Fang on Glaceon! And Slash use Night Slash on the Roserade!" "Seems I underestimated you... very well, I'll have to step up my game. "C'mon out Steelix!". Bam! Another grunt had hit me in the head with something. “Who says I play fair! I don't know if I could've beaten you, but I wasn't risking it. I never play fair.”

I woke up in a prison cell, no pokeballs. Things were going good, I finally caught the Admin and I was going to battle him. Then I ended up here, all alone. “Ha, to think that if I hadn't followed him, I would just be living my life...” “But then you wouldn't have been here, now if you get out, you can stop them.” “Heh, maybe your right... thanks.” “No problem, it's just that I had been going through a phase also, I had lost all hope to, and this kid Ash...

The Kid walked up to me and asked me “Why are you so bummed? There are a lot of people out there, that have it worse of then you. Right now, I'm trying to help them, I saw Pokemon, which are people too, they were being dragged into a building. I'm going to stop them now.” “I guess they're is hope isn't there, thanks. I think I'll come and help those Pokemon. Thanks.” “Your welcome, now lets go! OK, come on out Drapion! Lets do this.” “Alright!”

“So this 'Ash' guy helped you? What happened?” “Well we got in here...” “Wait where are we?” “The old Pokemon league building. I was near here about to face the Pokemon League, a week ago. I was so sad because my Pokemon... had pasted away. Then Ash came and he made me feel, that feeling, excitement. I never though I could feel that again. But I did, and I loved it. Anyways, we were facing someone and we got hit by a haywire Thunder, we got separated and I don't know where he went, but I passed out and got stuck in here.

“Well we gotta get out find him and stop these evil villains!” “Really? Your in?” “Humph, of course! How the freak are we going to get out though?” “I don't know, these things are obviously Pokemon proof.” “Well, I got an idea. “Slash come on... Dammit! He is gone! Our Pokeballs are outside!” “Your right!” “What are we going to do?” “I don't know, the answers usually just come to me, its so easy, I've never had a challenge like this. My life is usually kinda bland, no problems, just school, home and train some when allowed, by Team Sky...”

“Well they're has to be something, right?” I said. “Well I think they're is something.” He pulled a Pokeball out of his pocket. “There's nothing in this, but I think I have an idea, this is the only thing that I can use.” He put the pokeball on the floor and smashed it, Blam! Then he threw it threw the bars and tried to hit the Pokeballs but it missed. "Damn!" “Are you trying to knock that one over so the Pokemon will come out?” “Yeah.” “How did you even come up with that?” “Well it was the only thing on me, so I was thinking of things to do with it.” “OK, but I got another idea...

[Frenchfry]

START A NEW LINE EVERY NEW SPEAKER.
Instead of:
"[1st person dialogue] "[2nd person dialogue"
Do:
"[1st person dialogue]"

"[2nd person dialogue]"

In addition to that being proper, it's ten billion times easier to read.

Other than that, good job.

[DarK_SouL]

Thanks, that'll be in the next part!

[Jerry]

Yup, I was having a hard time guessing who was saying what...

It does seem strange that pokeballs can be smashed like that

Good job on the whole, only a few typos (in the form of repeated words) slowed the reading down.

[DarK_SouL]

It does seem strange that pokeballs can be smashed like that

That was what I was going for, 'm trying to make things happen in the Pokemon Universe )No pun intended.) that people never think about.