[GUILD] Pokemon Knights

[Tickles]

Welcome back KaminaEXE. Everything is kind of on pause since gen 6 came out, now that there is a whole new battle system, a new type, and a lot of balancing to do. Plus, we still need the map. But I'm glad the project is still a go. And I haven't done a guild maintenance in a long time, so I might take care of that this saturday. Expect PM's people.

So, name is changed. Got a nice ring to it. Now you all must get used to it.

[Desbear]

:T Still calling you Cote-Cortex.


Edit: Actually, I'll just call you Xotec.


Edit 2:'Eeeey! Thanks for replying really quickly to the name change Cortex! It was actually waaaay quicker then I had expected ._.

[Tickles]

:T Still calling you Cote-Cortex.


Edit: Actually, I'll just call you Xotec.


Edit 2:'Eeeey! Thanks for replying really quickly to the name change Cortex! It was actually waaaay quicker then I had expected ._.

No prob, and do that again, and I slap you through the internet.

[Desbear]

'kay, Xotec!

[Tickles]

Shut it Dalicmahballs. Yeah, thought I forgot about that? You did? Poor kid, your memory is broken.

[Humen]

whos da-lic-mah-balls?

[The-Blades-slave]

Gameboy Advanced is.

[Tickles]

Ok everyone, sent out a massive guild PM. It has specific instructions on it. I hope to hear for all of you soon.

[The-Blades-slave]

HELP
Appearance: Ashton has a heart-shaped face, with flat cheekbones and a sharp chin. His downturned eyes are an clouded hazel, hiding a gleam of knowledge behind their relaxed gaze. An aquiline nose rests above his thin lips, giving him a laid back look. Raven black hair, kept thin due to his Mother's insistence, hangs straight down into an angular cut at his jaw. The carefree features of Ashton's face are merely a reflection of his entire body structure, and everything-always in his pocket arms to his constant half-grin-reeked of a relaxed manner. He walks in evenly paced strides, his back straight and his face darting inconspicuously from left to right, observing everything, eyes hidden by the rim of his red and white ball cap.

Criticize that. Must get better. Do it.

[Tickles]

HELP
Appearance: Ashton has a heart-shaped face, with flat cheekbones and a sharp chin. His downturned eyes are an clouded hazel, hiding a gleam of knowledge behind their relaxed gaze. An aquiline nose rests above his thin lips, giving him a laid back look. Raven black hair, cut thin due to his Mother's insistence, hangs straight down into an angular cut at his jaw. The carefree features of Ashton's face are merely a reflection of his entire body structure, and everything-always in his pocket arms to his constant half-grin-reeked of a relaxed manner. He walks in evenly paced strides, his back straight and his face darting inconspicuously from left to right, observing everything, eyes hidden by the rim of his red and white ball cap.

Criticize that. Must get better. Do it.

Well, if you want constructive criticism, I suggest lessening the details a bit, and go more general. You're literally overloading yourself to try and make  perfect description, so a little can go a long way. Leads more to the mystery of a character, you can always add the other details later on during the progression of a story/RP/Novel etc.

[The-Blades-slave]

See, that's the thing, I'm trying to. We have a different writing styles Cortex. You prefer less to more, and let people imagine, while I prefer to control and make less more. Not saying either's bad, just different styles. But I'll keep that in mind, thanks for the advice. Plus, that's just how he looks. I got something else to accomplish in this RP. Experimenting with my style about. Experimenting with emotions this RP, specifically.

Edit: Out of curiosity, how would you describe him, Cortex? The character is basically Red's spitting image, so look at that. Teen version, not trainer guy dude.

[Tickles]

Aston has a medium build, and nonchalant look about him. His hazel eyes hide seamlessly behind is raven black hair, covered by a red cap, always turned forward. His flat cheekbones come down to a slightly pointed chin, supporting his thin lips and aquiline nose, making his face almost heart shaped.

There, all the details you want, without all the extra things. As for those, try to place them in the bio.

[The-Blades-slave]

That's the problem. Those have nothing to do with the bio. They wouldn't be in there, and they are there for one purpose. I mix appearance with personality because I think personality is pointless, THAT'S what I expand on in the RP.

I dunno, the problem might be one of my favorite authors when I started writing was J.R.R Tolkien. He never really left anything to question, from posture to attitude, and that's where my inspiration came from.

[Jerry]

I'd go for giving details as the story proceeds, just like Cor-- I mean Xetroc said. I'm curious though about what you're saying. Could you mention which book does Tolkien do such a thorough description so I can have a look?

[The-Blades-slave]

The Silmarillion was the one I had in mind most, but I actually opened it again for the first time in a few years. He didn't describe with the style of less is more in that, but he wasn't really that descriptive either... It almost feels like he stated feats of people and let you have your own thoughts, no details given... I kinda wanna try that now. It was a more mystical way of writing if anything.

If you have the time or have read it, Jerry, mind giving me your thoughts on that? Maybe I'm reading too much into things. Took a break from writing for a while, and now working on redesigning my style.